Holding Peace
October 16, 2023 Kosmos Community News

‘Life is both dreadful and wonderful…How can I smile when I am filled with so much sorrow?
– you need to smile to your sorrow, because you are more than your sorrow.’ – Thich Nhat Hanh

Dear Reader,

We are more than our sorrow, more than our anger or fear. Yet, for thousands of years we have allowed our pain and our grievances to define our identities – victim/oppressor, winner/loser.

Maybe our troubles really did begin with the thinking mind, the idea of ‘me’ and ‘mine’. There must have been a time in our human evolution when we lived in pure awareness, attuned to the natural world the same way other animals, plants and minerals are. And while we can’t return to that pre-egoic state, maybe we can regain something we lost – our wakefulness and interconnection with all Life – even in the midst of horror. In a state of awareness, it is no longer possible to intentionally harm or kill another. It’s like the right hand cutting off the left – an act of pure madness.

Madness is what we see now in the external world, and it is excruciating to witness. The reality of innocent children – wounded, dying, alone – is too great to bear. I feel depleted and I’m sure you do too. But we are more. I think the madness is unveiling what many of us are experiencing as an inner revolution. We are keeping the energy of our compassion alive by coming together in peace, by speaking and listening with great love to our friends impacted by trauma, by reducing harm through our actions and reactions. We are radiating peace to others by any means possible. If it means standing in the rain with a peace sign, volunteering at a hospital or shelter, sending aid, or praying in a circle, we know this is our evolutionary responsibility. Because we are evolving into something so much more than…this.

In times of sorrow, I turn to trusted spiritual friends. May the resources below, curated by Buddhist dharma teacher John Bell, help point us toward peace.

A Message from Kosmos Spiritual Friend, John Bell

Reflections on Gaza, Israel and our collective pain

Dear Friends,

I know that the situation in Gaza and Israel has impacted your heart and mind. Maybe, like me, you’ve alternately felt heartsick, angry, confused, judgmental, numb, compassionate, and more. I for one start with feeling humble and poorly informed before the enormity of the situation. I also assume that anything I say might draw criticism or disapproval from others because of my misperceptions and/or because of the deep trauma that has been triggered for so many of us. And there is no shortage of public commentary, anguish, horror stories, condemnation, and well-intentioned offerings out there already, so I don’t need to add my opinions. But I can’t help myself.

I first want to say that I stand with the people of Israel. And I stand with the people of Palestine. I deplore the violence that Hamas unleashed on Israeli civilians, and I deplore the violence that the Israeli forces have unleashed on civilians in Gaza. Neither Hamas nor the current Israeli government represent the deep aspirations of their people, which is to live in peace, without fear, with dignity and security. For now, I grieve for all the immeasurable loss, and do my best to listen well and to hold the situation with compassion.

READ THE FULL ESSAY

Message to the International Plum Village Community for Peace in the Middle East

“With compassion, love, and wisdom in our hearts we can make ourselves available to listen deeply to the cries of those now in Gaza and Israel and elsewhere in the world—the cries of those undergoing the deep mental crisis of being trapped in a conflict zone, who are looking to keep their love strong in the midst of this horror. We need to lend them our strength. We all need to go beyond the delusive and destructive idea that we are separate from each other.

Let us create islands of non-violence and peace in our hearts, in our homes and beyond, via email, phone and video. Let us live every moment seeing those we think of as the enemy as not separate from ourselves—as our own blood, skin and bones—and let us not allow hatred to take over. Let us come back and take care of our feelings with calm and clarity, holding our sadness, fear, anger, and despair and resist the temptation to blame, punish, and have to choose a side.”

READ THE FULL MESSAGE

American activist and filmmaker, Valerie Kaur

“You will hear: ‘Our aggression is the only response to their aggression, our fear more justified than their fear, our grief more devastating than theirs ever will be.’

But oh my love, the hierarchy of pain is the old way. The moment we allow our hearts to go numb is the moment we shut down our humanity.

I don’t know the solution to the conflict in Israel and Palestine, but I do know the starting point: To grieve ‘their’ children as our children. It’s the only way to break the cycle.

To my loved ones who are Israeli, Jewish and Palestinian: I see your searing pain. I love you and grieve with you and am reciting my ancestors’ prayers for protection as you search for your families and bear the unbearable. May love find you through the impossible.

To all of us witnessing Israel and Palestine: What does love want you to do? If you want to help but don’t know how: Begin in relationship. Who in your life is hurting from this? Offer to walk with them, listen to them.

There is no fixing grief, only bearing it together. Only then do we know what to do next. If you are falling apart: Your breathlessness is not a sign of your weakness, but of your strength. Of how deeply you feel the horror, how deeply you care. You still feel. And that matters in a world that wants us to feel nothing. Who can feel it with you? Breathe with you?

Opening our hearts to grief – others’ and our own – is how we hold our humanity in a world that would destroy it. It’s how we will begin to survive this.”

– valarie kaur